Atmospheric pressure

The atmosphere in my house is … tense. For a multitude of reasons. My husband gets nuts when the New York Jets play. He literally screams at the television, scaring the kids and the dog, and they’re not having a great season (the Jets, not the dog). Meanwhile, I’m trying to stay offline in an attempt to cling to my last remaining bits of sanity and self-control. I desperately wish I could Rip-Van-Winkle away the next few days. I just want to wake up on Wednesday feeling like this country is going to be all right, ya know? And lastly, my manuscript, which has been a monster of a book to draft, feels like a never-ending burden. I know it will get finished one day. But one day feels like an eternity from now. And I question everything I’m doing. Everything.

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Anyway, in an effort to distract myself from the unpleasantness that is 2016, and procrastinate the book that gives me agita, I’ve been enjoying a steady of diet of Buzzfeed videos and Pinterest — two innocuous things providing me with a daily dose of fluff and mindlessness. So far, it’s working in that it lowers my blood pressure and raises my consciousness on what happens when couples wax each others’ facial hair (it’s a thing, apparently).

I’ve been throwing around the notion that writers are probably more neurotic and depressive creatures than most people (or at least, I am). I think it’s because we live in our imaginations so much, we see the world as this magical place, but reality can often be an uneventful letdown. It’s easy for writers to disconnect from the real world in favor of the made-up place they prefer. I have a hard time not assigning every stranger I meet an elaborate  backstory or secret identity. Or walking around the woods wondering if I’m going to stumble upon a dead body (I blame Law and Order for this). My mind is always spinning a story, always imagining the possibilities, and it makes for a chaotic reality that only I endure.

So….

This blog post seems to be as scattered and disjointed as I currently feel.

How are you all coping?

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Author: Kimberly G. Giarratano

I'm a YA author. And mom of 3. I'm also tired. Very, very tired.

12 thoughts on “Atmospheric pressure”

  1. I love this blog post. You had me at “waxing each other’s facial hair.” I hope you get out of your funk soon. I was there last week, or maybe it was the week before.

  2. I’m just glad all the commercials will be over tomorrow.

    There was a psychologist on Jungle Reds. He said writers are not necessarily more depressive, but because we spend more time examining our feelings we notice it more. I can buy that.

    As for me – pass the truffles!

  3. I’m coping similarly. Saturday I spent two hours working on the kitchen floor: vacuumed it twice, then on hands and knees scrubbing up the sticky spots, then steam mopping. All the while I was playing my “Venus” playlist as loud as I possibly could which includes the original and “Venus” by Bananara and the original version by Shocking Blue, “Girls Just Want to Have Fun”, “Holding out for Hero” by Bonnie Tyler, “I Need a Hero” by Sarah Buxton (my favorite version), “I Will Survive”, “Lady Marmalade”, “We Built This City”, “Lil Red Riding Hood” (Sam the Sham and the Pharohs) and “Hit the Road Jack”.

    Cleaning the crap out of something is satisfying. My arms ache but the floor is clean. Cleaner, at least.

    Tomorrow is another day, Scarlet.

  4. Aw, hang in there, Kimberly! I hear ya about just wanting to wake up on Wednesday and feel like the country is going to be okay. This election has been really stressful! Your post made me think of a book called The Forest for the Trees by Betsy Lerner that navigates the psyche of different types of writers, one of which was the neurotic writer 🙂

  5. Love the gif! I do that about ten times a day. I pretend it’s yoga. As far as depression, I had a young friend — a talented writer — who killed herself a few years ago. At her funeral, she was perfectly described as “feeling the world too deeply.” I try to remember that when things seem overwhelming. We can only control what we can control. And if it’s by removing each other’s facial hair, I say, HEAT UP THAT WAX! Hang in there, peeps. The sun will keep rising and setting on a gorgeous world.

  6. Big Hug Kimberly – Wednesday is coming and not a moment too soon for my taste!

    And I’m in the last throes of first draft edits for my latest book, which had me feeling the exact same way you do during the writing of the last half. Know what? When I read it all together it worked! I’m wishing the same for you.

    One of my English teachers in high school once said that writers not only feel things more deeply than other people, they climb into other people’s feelings and pull them on like a second skin. She claimed this was the way to inhabit a character, and to uncover depth in characters. I do find that I do that, in life and in writing. Keep a clown nose handy, stick it on when you write to always remind you that pathos must be balanced by humor, and as writers, we control that. Seriously, it worked for me–still does when I need it.

  7. Thanks, ladies! I’m starting to feel better all ready. Well, ask me Wednesday morning.
    Keenan — that playlist is the bomb. I’d clean to that.

    I just thought of this, but writers (and other creative types) force themselves to bleed on their work only to have it rejected or criticized. It really amazes me anyone becomes a writer at all.

  8. Great post. I’m glad you look for dead bodies everywhere because that is where great stories come from. Sometimes I look through my newspaper and do the same thing — what if that car accident was not really an accident; who is that person standing way in the back of the news photo just watching; and the list goes on. I also do the revers sometimes when I read a book — what would I do if I met this “person” in the grocery store; if this person moved into the house down the street; would I notice, and the list goes on.

    That’s why I like mystery books — everything could be different from what it seems or maybe it is just what it looks like — HUM which is it?

  9. Late to another party. Probably just as well because I don’t want to be a downer (which is kinda where my atmosphere is right now). The only thing I know is that the sun’ll come out tomorrow. Right? Right???

  10. Loving that playlist! I, too, am in a funk. It will pass, but while it’s here…oy. I’m wrapping myself in my posses, both real and virtual, and that helps. Also, had a fab writers’ group meeting a week ago, and we all voted to spend our time writing together. It was fantastic!

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